So, you wanna be a qualified intermediary, great!

With relief at source and not disclosed your clients will be merry;

But if your KYC rules didn’t make their list;

Your chances of QI are zero, nada, nothing, Get the gist?

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You’re on the list. Hooray! And now just two forms, to apply;

But if you fail or don’t step up, you stay an NQI;

And then you need to document your clients very quickly;

Cos otherwise you hit them 30 points right in the divi.

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You need to know the consequences of your QI actions;

Resources, training, operations, these must be your guiding passions;

For failure to be adequate in any material way;

Sets you up for penalties and you could go to jail!

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Revenue Procedures tell you what to do;

Notices and Publications are important too;

Get ’em, read ’em, know ’em or you’ll be in the poo;

At the end of the day, good preparation is your cue.

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KYC, AML, series W-8;

Don’t forget LOB to get your entities straight;

Check they’re right, on the face and in your records too;

Otherwise you break the rules and you’re the one who looks a fool.

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Chapter 4 then Chapter 3 that’s the payment rule;

Penalise in FATCA then Chapter 3 is cool;

Pay the treasury on your own or use an upstream agent;

You carry the can either way, so make sure you’re not complacent.

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On board, off board who’s to choose;

US clients can give you the blues;

But tax is a product not a task;

So figure a solution and you’ll have their cash.

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And if this little ditty helped you understand QI, then smile;

We aimed to please and ease your day, if only for a while;

But if you’re worried that theory and reality just don’t reconcile;

Then write, reply or easier still, just dial.

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Image Credit: Keith Bellvay